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For Wendy
Since there is no attainment
the Boddhisattvas depend on nothing;
remaining in deep immediate awareness
their minds are unhindered.
With unhindered minds
they have no fear,
go far beyond falsity,
and dwell in complete nirvana.
The Heart Sutra
One
A Historian visits
A historian visits South Africa.
Most "white" people he meets
fear the future.
They see only
"more violence"
"less money"
"a hard time ahead."
But he also finds that a minority—
religious people,
organised women,
some NGO members
—the people who still carry on
for peace and for democracy
have a careful optimism.
They say:
"Things'll improve."
"We're learning to work together."
"There are many small victories."
Two
a revision
out of the lie of no
rises the truth of yes
only herself and who
illimitably is
making fools understand
(like wintry me)
that not all matterings of mind
equal one
orange
Three
fear-speakings
speech by one who is afraid;
speech which is afraid of fear;
speech which teaches subtle terror;
speech to cause another fear;
Inner speech which skirts the edge of fear all night, knowing
the lip of the black abyss filled with the subtle inner fire of alarm
Inner speech which runs the news CNN massacres running
down the street people and black smoke pain breaking
glass loss loss loss
talk which makes the speaker fear:
talk anticipating pain;
talk about or inducing fear, spoken between midnight and 4:00 am;
inner speech of absent pain, or contingent pain;
silent talk of loss;
talk which remembers old hurt;
talk recollecting ancient fear;
talk of fear of the parents, or of their loss
fear of angerwords of worry — a stone in the breast
words of dread — a flame in the belly
words of fear — a rag in the throat
words of terror — mud holds the feet
Four
some stories of the dark
i
A woman who lived
alone in a flat
heard a man breaking in
to her place in the dark.
She sat up and yelled:
"Whoever you are,
you'd better go now!
I'm taking my gun
from under the pillow!"
He came down the passage.
She shouted, "I'm loading
the clip full of bullets."
He carried on coming
to where she was lying.
She said, "Now I'm taking
the catch off the safety,"
and loosened the catch.
He entered her room.
She shot him six times.
He died in his blood
on her bedroom floor
still holding his knife.
The man was a rapist
who'd just been let out
of five years in jail.
The police didn't care
that the gun was unlicensed.
They said: "Get yourself
a much bigger gun.
If his clothes had been thicker
you may not have got him."
ii
A thief came to Ryokan
who lived alone in a hut
below the mountain.Ryokan had nothing,
so he gave the thief his clothes,
and the thief stole away.
"Poor man. A pity I couldn't
give him the beautiful mOOn."
iii
a woman drives a friend home
her car is stopped by
dancing chanting youths
stones break glass
noise spins the world
she's a runner
done marathons —
she's no sprinter but
she gets out and runs
they catch her
another woman tries to interpose her body
but a woman's body
is easily shoved aside
they are many
they kill
the woman
who ran
their knives
slicing into
her face
and her body
Five
Sister True EmptinessShakyamuni Buddha sees clearly:
age, disease and death
attend us constantly:also, no where is safe
from ones who come
bulleting in with knife, gun, stone —
break skin crush bone
grab things, bring pain —
life is contingent
and empty.
Sister True Emptiness walks
through the war in Vietnam —
all the Mai Lai's of suffering
wash up against her.
Breathing in, calm body
breathing out, smile —
tirelessly assisting all sentient beings
in this wonderful moment.She must have been in her sixties when I met her
She was precise, and smiled a lot.
I liked the feel of her.
Six
snake & rope
The primal consciousness-mistake,
from what the Hindu sages tell,
is thinking that the rope's a snake.
The error we so simply make
when we take emptiness for hell
(the primal consciousness-mistake)
comes before thought. The rope we take
for serpent, is just hemp — how well
in seeing, it becomes a snake.
We jump and scream and grab the rake
to kill the cobra, and we've made
the primal consciousness-mistake.
The coil of fibre for whose sake
we catch our breath and leap and yell
becomes in mind a "rope" or "snake".
The fright is real, the snake's a fake
and we the victims of the spell —
the primal consciousness-mistake
of sensing rope and seeing snake.
Seven
In the garden, lifting leaves,
drop a cup — flick out your foot
drop a knife — whip it back
how does the seer grasp the world
when the meaning comes before the thought?
In the garden, lifting leaves
my hand jerks away
heart pumps
sweat comes...EEAAAGH!
A HAIRY CATERPILLAR!
and the boy who poked
around outside the house
in hairy-caterpillar-land
revisits what
his mother said:beware beware
don't touch the ones
which have the hair
they burn! they sting!
you let them be!
or guess how sorry
you will be.
Eight
the chant against fear
Fear is the mind-killer
Fear the heart-twister
Fear is the limb-shaker
Fear the dance-ender
Breath is the sanctuary
Now is the dance time
This is the sacred space
There is no other place