| Notes for a Sanctuary For Wendy Since there is no attainment the Boddhisattvas depend on nothing; remaining in deep immediate awareness their minds are unhindered. With unhindered minds they have no fear, go far beyond falsity, and dwell in complete nirvana. The Heart Sutra
One
A Historian visits
A historian visits South Africa. Most "white" people he meets fear the future. They see only "more violence" "less money" "a hard time ahead." But he also finds that a minority religious people, organised women, some NGO members the people who still carry on for peace and for democracy have a careful optimism.
They say: "Things'll improve." "We're learning to work together." "There are many small victories."
Two
a revision
out of the lie of no rises the truth of yes only herself and who illimitably is
making fools understand (like wintry me) that not all matterings of mind equal one violet orange
Three
fear-speakings
speech by one who is afraid; speech which is afraid of fear; speech which teaches subtle terror; speech to cause another fear; Inner speech which skirts the edge of fear all night, knowing the lip of the black abyss filled with the subtle inner fire of alarm Inner speech which runs the news CNN massacres running down the street people and black smoke pain breaking glass loss loss loss
talk which makes the speaker fear: talk anticipating pain; talk about or inducing fear, spoken between midnight and 4:00 am; inner speech of absent pain, or contingent pain; silent talk of loss; talk which remembers old hurt; talk recollecting ancient fear; talk of fear of the parents, or of their loss fear of anger
words of worry a stone in the breast words of dread a flame in the belly words of fear a rag in the throat words of terror mud holds the feet

Four some stories of the dark i A woman who lived alone in a flat heard a man breaking in to her place in the dark. She sat up and yelled: "Whoever you are, you'd better go now! I'm taking my gun from under the pillow!" He came down the passage. She shouted, "I'm loading the clip full of bullets." He carried on coming
to where she was lying. She said, "Now I'm taking the catch off the safety," and loosened the catch. He entered her room. She shot him six times. He died in his blood on her bedroom floor still holding his knife.
The man was a rapist who'd just been let out of five years in jail. The police didn't care that the gun was unlicensed. They said: "Get yourself a much bigger gun. If his clothes had been thicker you may not have got him."
ii A thief came to Ryokan who lived alone in a hut below the mountain. Ryokan had nothing, so he gave the thief his clothes, and the thief stole away. "Poor man. A pity I couldn't give him the beautiful mOOn."
iii a woman drives a friend home her car is stopped by dancing chanting youths stones break glass noise spins the world
she's a runner done marathons she's no sprinter but she gets out and runs they catch her
another woman tries to interpose her body but a woman's body is easily shoved aside
they are many they kill the woman who ran their knives slicing into her face and her body
Five
Sister True Emptiness Shakyamuni Buddha sees clearly: age, disease and death attend us constantly: also, no where is safe from ones who come bulleting in with knife, gun, stone break skin crush bone grab things, bring pain life is contingent and empty.
Sister True Emptiness walks through the war in Vietnam all the Mai Lai's of suffering wash up against her. Breathing in, calm body breathing out, smile tirelessly assisting all sentient beings in this wonderful moment. She must have been in her sixties when I met her She was precise, and smiled a lot. I liked the feel of her.

Six
snake & rope
The primal consciousness-mistake, from what the Hindu sages tell, is thinking that the rope's a snake. The error we so simply make when we take emptiness for hell (the primal consciousness-mistake) comes before thought. The rope we take for serpent, is just hemp how well in seeing, it becomes a snake. We jump and scream and grab the rake to kill the cobra, and we've made the primal consciousness-mistake. The coil of fibre for whose sake we catch our breath and leap and yell becomes in mind a "rope" or "snake". The fright is real, the snake's a fake and we the victims of the spell the primal consciousness-mistake of sensing rope and seeing snake.
Seven
In the garden, lifting leaves,
drop a cup flick out your foot drop a knife whip it back how does the seer grasp the world when the meaning comes before the thought? In the garden, lifting leaves my hand jerks away heart pumps sweat comes... EEAAAGH! A HAIRY CATERPILLAR! and the boy who poked around outside the house in hairy-caterpillar-land revisits what his mother said:
beware beware don't touch the ones which have the hair they burn! they sting! you let them be! or guess how sorry you will be.
Eight the chant against fear
Fear is the mind-killer Fear the heart-twister Fear is the limb-shaker Fear the dance-ender Breath is the sanctuary Now is the dance time This is the sacred space There is no other place
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